For lack of a better word

"Oh, are you a runner?"

"Um... I guess. Yep. I dunno."

For whatever reason the phrase "wannabe" has negative connotations for me. Like when we were in high school and somebody was called a "wannabe" it was never meant in a flattering manner. But it is an apt description for one who aspires to something, but isn't quite there yet.

Guess which one is the Wannabe.

I have now owned four pairs of running shoes (including one pair returned and one pair ordered but not yet received). I have more pairs of exercise pants than jeans. I'm running about 20 miles a week; that's not a lot, but it is enough to prove my commitment, I think. I haven't lost any blackened toenails yet, but I think that's mainly because I figured out early on I need to wear men's socks (they're larger). And I sure know more about my feet than ever before, right down to my Morton's Toe.

And yet, somehow, I just don't quite identify myself as a Runner. Not publicly, at least. I feel like I haven't earned it.

What will that take?

I'm going nuts without any races on my calendar. One day I'm ready to register for a marathon, the next day I think I must be crazy to even consider it. The Route 66 Marathon in Tulsa, OK gives special finisher's medals for first-timers. (And an extra trinket for visiting The Center of the Universe. I've been there!) But, ugh, I'd have to GET THERE first. And then actually finish.

Cuh-RAZY.

So, for now, I'm happy with calling myself a "wannabe" instead of a runner. I expect that to change, though.